Archive for the ‘life and living’ Category

Polish exams for foreigners

Monday, March 10th, 2008

Recently I have been thinking about sitting a Polish language exam. I figured that now my Polish is a little stronger having lived here a while, it makes sense to sit the exam and get something to show for my time here on my CV. Plus I reckon it will spur me on to study some more if I know I have an exam looming…

After a bit of research on the Internet (god I love wikipedia) it turns out that there is a Common European Framework of Reference for Languages and an Association of Language Testers in Europe (ALTE). After digging a bit further it turns out that the prestigious Jagiellonian University in Krakow is the Polish ALTE member responsible for the Polish language exam for foreigners as commissioned by no less than the Polish Ministry of National Education and Sports.

Here is the official website (from what I can work out anyway) on the Polish as a Foreign Language series of exams. There are currently 3 exams:

  • Basic level – Poziom podstawowy – ALTE level B1
  • Medium level – Poziom sredni ogólny – ALTE level B2
  • Advanced level – Poziom zaawansowany – ALTE level C2

There is an online bookshop that has Polish books for foreigners and most of the titles are labelled with their corresponding ALTE difficulty levels. Also, on the official website there are downloadable sample papers (see the link above).

If anyone has done these exams or can recommend preparatory materials, please let me know!

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Women’s day – 8th March

Saturday, March 8th, 2008

Our baby crying woke me up at 4am this morning, my wife too. First thing she said to me was “aren’t you going to wish me happy women’s day?” I couldn’t believe it! I told her that until my brain wakes up in at least another 4 hours time it’s not women’s day or any other day and to go back to sleep.

Of course when we finally did get up today I had forgotten all about our earlier verbal exchange and so again got another nagging.

So anyway, this got me thinking, what exactly is this women’s day thing? I remember being equally confused about it last year and presuming it was some communist throwback. I have heard the stories many times from my mother-in-law about how my father-in-law used to get incredibly drunk (as all the men did) and give flowers and tights to the female workers at the local factory. But my wife insists it’s an American tradition and not communist at all. Being sceptical about that I turned to the holy grail of knowledge – wikipedia - which says that the tradition started in America and was adopted by Russia (amongst other countries).

I presume that this day has died out in America or isn’t so popular, because as a Brit I have never heard of it or seen it mentioned in any films or news. Therefore I still reckon it’s a communist throwback, just don’t tell my wife.

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Pole caught having sex with Henry Hoover

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

I like to read the “strange news” from around the world and I like to read news about Poland or Polish people. This one cropped up for being both strange and Polish:

Worker caught having sex with Henry Hoover

Apparently though he was just “cleaning his underpants”, and that “vacuuming underpants is a common practice in Poland”. Wierd.

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Pudzianowski dancing

Monday, March 3rd, 2008

I had to blog about this. For those of you who don’t know who Mariusz Pudzianowski, he’s a world famous body-builder. One of only 3 men to have won the world strong man competition 4 times.

Before I had heard of other famous Poles such as Lech Wałesa or who the Kaczyński twins were I knew who Mariusz was – guys in the gym I trained in in London would talk about him and I’d seen him on TV in the strongman competitions.

So as the first Pole I had heard of and as a weight-trainer myself I have always admired Pudzianowski.

But then he went on Polish TV’s “dancing with stars”.

Why oh why Mariusz? Please stick to lifting heavy things and not poncing around on the dancefloor with C-list celebraties, actors nobody has heard of and wanna-make-a-comeback singers!

I am worried the kids in my new local gym will take your pictures down otherwise…

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Why do you keep asking me about my mother?

Sunday, March 2nd, 2008

I don’t understand it. How comes when I fill out a form they ask such odd questions:

  • What level of education do I have? This is wierd – what on earth has this got to do with me registering a car? In fact they ask this one everywhere – try opening a bank account or registering the birth of your child. I can only presume it’s related to the Polish obession with education.
  • What is my Mother’s first name? Usually followed by what is my Father’s first name? Why? Are you going to send them a note if I am naughty?
  • What is my Mother’s maiden name? Why? Are you going to try and hack into my HSBC account now that you have all of my other personal details?

I wonder what they do with all this information. Probably nothing. Answers on a postcard please…

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My top 5 things I like about Poland

Friday, February 29th, 2008

I know there’s a tendancy to be critical when talking about what’s different in a new country, so I just thought I’d put a few things I like about Poland because I think overall it’s a great place and don’t have any regrets about moving here.

  1. The weather is better. No you read that right – the weather is better. I know that it drops to minus 1o sometimes at night in the depths of winter (or lower I hear in years gone by), but I would rather have -10 degrees with crisp white snow everywhere, a clear blue sky at day time and dry weather rather than +10 degrees in London but with drizzly rain and a depressing overcast grey sky. Plus summertime is much hotter than in the UK and I love the sun.
  2. The food is better. Well my wife says I don’t like Polish food but that’s not true, more that I am ambivalent about Polish food. However I am ambivalent about most food. But I still prefer to buy ‘proper’ meats and the local produce that is more readily available here rather than what I heard someone refer to as ‘plastic ham from Tescos’ in England.
  3. Family values are still important. The UK news always talks about moral decline, falling standards of behaviour in schools and in the streets and the increasing numbers of single-parent families. I like the fact that in Poland the family unit is respected more. I hear it was like that in the UK in the fifties, but given that I was only a gnat in my dad’s sack then I can’t comment on it.
  4. There is a lot of investment in Poland. I know that sounds like a bit of a crap reason to like Poland, but what I mean by it is that when you walk, drive or go anywhere you can’t help noticing the new buildings going up, the new roads being built or the pavements getting a much needed refurbishment. Whether I am alone on this I don’t know (please comment!) but it gives me a sense of excitement about how things will be here in the medium to long term. It also reaffirms my decision to move here that Poland is indeed on the up after being unjustly held back for so many decades.
  5. There are some beautiful places to visit. I thought Gdańsk was just a bombed-out ship yard until I visited it – UNBELIEVABLE! I couldn’t have been more wrong. Well worth a visit if you haven’t been there before. Poland has a choice of miles of sandy beach along the northern coastline or stunning scenery and skiing in the mountains in the south. Plus there are loads of places to visit in between.
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Must remember to carry my documents!

Friday, February 29th, 2008

I seem to keep blogging about vehicle related stuff, but given that I do a lot of driving over here I guess that can’t be helped.

This is a post about remembering to carry your documents with you when driving in Poland. This is something I find hard to adjust to, I simply never remembered to do so having never had to carry documents in the UK. I know that this is a fairly ‘normal’ requirement, and possibly not unreasonable, but I can’t help also feeling slightly resentful that I have to carry documents with me everywhere I go.

Now that I have a Polish car the registration certficate is a tiny practical thing that comes laminated and handily fits in my wallet so I don’t have to remember it anymore. But when I first came over with my van, my UK documents were of course all A4 and I had them filed away in a safe place.

So anyway one day early in 2007 I was taking the van back to England for another trip to collect more stuff and to sit an exam back in London. My wife came wife me as usual, but along for the ride was my father-in-law who spontaneously thought he might as well take advantage of a free trip to London given that we had a 3rd seat in the van and he had the time free.
We only got about 2 hours down the motorway when we were stopped by Polish customs.
Now I should mention that if you have an old English van and are returning from anywhere in Central/Eastern Europe you are GUARANTEED TO GET STOPPED at least once on your journey. They expect you to be stocked to the ceiling with cheap cigarettes to dodge the duty in the U.K. Polish customs like to set up random stop check points on border routes and I was on the main E40 motorway heading for Germany.

So of course they asked for my driver’s licence, registration certificate and certificate of insurance. I had my licence in my wallet but then remembered that everything else was safely filed away in my filing cabinet back in our flat. The customs guy was incredibly rude. He asked me why on earth I wasn’t carrying my insurance and what would I do in the event of an accident – this seemed like a stupid question to me and I made my reaction obvious – if you have an accident you exchange details and then spend months piddling about with the paperwork later – what difference is there if my policy is physically with me or not? The important thing is whether I have the insurance or not, which I did.

So he searched the van, found nothing of course, then decided to call the police to report me for not having my documents. I wasn’t too fussed at this point, more annoyed that we were being pointlessly delayed, but my wife was going ballistic with me – she couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought about documents. Meanwhile my father-in-law was going a funny colour and looking incredibly stressed. I have learnt now that the older generation of Pole are typically quite afraid and respectful of the authorities, and from the look on his face I thought he was going to have a heart attack about it. So 2 hours later (I couldn’t just drive off as customs were still holding my driver’s licence – believe me, I thought about it) the police arrived. Luckily for me they were two younger and friendly guys who clearly weren’t impressed with customs that they had been called out just for this. Seeing how annoyed my wife still was with me, one of them jokingly offered her his baton and showed her where she should hit me with it to not leave any obvious marks. Then they issued me with the minimum on the spot ticket they could – 50 zloty – and sent us on our way.

Of course when I got to the German border the German customs pulled us aside for another search. “Papiere bitte” they asked. Again my father-in-law turned a funny colour. Again my luck was in – because I can speak German I told them that I had lost my documents (well, a small stretch of the truth) and had already got a ticket for it in Poland but needed to get back to the UK to sort my documents out. The customs officer looked at the amount of the ticket, commented on what good value it was said that in Germany it wouldn’t have been so cheap before sending us on our way again.

Moral of the story – repeat after me: I will always carry my documents with me when driving in Europe.

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No, Northern Ireland is not somewhere in England

Friday, February 29th, 2008

One of my websites is a little eCommerce shop where I sell products and then post them off. This means I have parcels to send by registered delivery on an almost daily basis to (usually) the UK and Ireland.

90% of these orders are to England so I didn’t mind too much when the woman at the counter at the local post office would add “ANGLIA” to the end of the address (apparently “United Kingdom” isn’t enough). I started to do the same to save time at the post office, putting “SZKOCJA” or “WALIA” where appropriate. One day I had a parcel for Northern Ireland and so had written “United Kingdom, PÓŁNOCNA IRLANDIA”) on the address. I was quite suprised when she told me I had to put “Anglia” on it. What followed was an extremely strange 5 minutes of argument because I refused to do so, telling her that Northern Ireland is not in England. She insisted that only “Anglia” was a recognised country and it had to be “Anglia”. I asked her if she thought that Scotland or Wales were in Anglia too, at which point some of the increasingly frustrated people queuing up behind me started to join in the argument too.

The situation was resolved by her calling her manager, who reluctantly agreed that we could leave the envelope as it was, but they weren’t convinced that it would get to it’s destination OK. I said I would take the chance.

When I got back home I was so annoyed I wrote a sarcastic email to the Polish postal service (Poczta Polska) asking them if they knew the difference between England, the UK and Great Britain or if they only had problems with European geography in my local branch.

I was suprised to get a letter out of the blue 2 months later stating that they had held an investigation, given the employees some training, and that according to their code of practice the country must be either Northern Ireland (PÓŁNOCNA IRLANDIA) or Great Britain (WIELKA BRYTANIA). As a nice little twist that made me smile, the letter also said that the woman serving me had tried to tell me that it must be “Wielka Brytania” but that I was rude to her. Err, no love. So she seems to have not only a problem with geography but memory problems too….

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Driving around in Poland

Thursday, February 28th, 2008

Insurance

One of the nice things about the car registration system in Poland is that unlike 3rd party insurance is included with the annual registration fee, similar to the Australian system.

This makes total sense – you are assured that all drivers have the minimum legally required insurance cover, unlike in London where I see that 1 in 10 drivers aren’t properly insured.

The plus side of this is that you can lend anyone your car as long as they have a valid driver’s licence. Gone to the pub and decided to drink? No problem, let someone else drive back…

Roads

As everybody knows the quality of the roads isn’t great, but what do you expect after years of underinvestment? The money is pouring in from the EU and they are busy building motorway networks. Give it a few more years and the roads won’t be so bad. They’ll just be full of traffic instead.

Overtaking

One of the pleasures (or terrors, depending on how you look at it) of driving over here for me, is the Polish custom for overtaking at any possible place, regardless of road-markings or oncoming traffic. Slow car in front? Overtake them anyway, the slow car will pull to the side to make room for you and the oncoming truck will do the same. Brilliant.

Lights

As of 2007 you have to drive with dipped headlights on 24/7. In previous years this was just required in winter months, now it is obligatory all year round. I know they thought about introducing this at EU level and dropped the idea because the enviromentalists said it would hurt the environment with the extra energy consumption. Personally I think it’s a great idea, it makes vehicles much easier to spot at distance or in bad weather and if that saves lives then it’s worth it.

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Number plates stolen in Gdańsk

Thursday, February 28th, 2008

Went to Gdańsk for a lovely few days to see the Baltic coast. My wife and I had borrowed her father’s car to make the trip. We parked it in the city centre and went for a meal one evening. I was quite suprised to come back and discover that someone had stolen our number plates.

Apparently this isn’t such a rare occurence – because Polish number plates start with a 3 letter code that shows which region the owner lives in, it’s easy to spot non-local vehicles. Thieves steal the plates to put on other cars so they can go and tank up on petrol without paying, or worse still, use their car for committing other crimes.

I wasn’t expecting the trouble involved though at the Police station. First we had to sign a warning that we weren’t allowed to drive the car on the road without replacement number plates, but to get the number plates we had to go to Opole (other end of the country) where the vehicle is registered.
Where’s the sense in that? Or am I stupid for even bothering to ask?

Given that we would have been stranded if we’d have left the car we of course drove it back with the registration number written on bits of paper in the windows (something better than nothing I guess). After an uneventful journey on the terrible Polish roads we got back without any further hassle.

The final sting in the tail was that we had to pay out 300 złoty to get new number plates. I guess on the plus side it could have been worse – at least they didn’t steal the car…

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